How do you keep your affection fresh and alive?

Most happily married couples have various habits or rituals that they do to help keep their marriages alive and fresh. These are the things that they do to say “I love you!” or “I still find you attractive and want to be with you” or “I might be leaving for a little while, but I will be missing you the entire time!”.


Sometimes, they could be as simple as holding hands whenever they are out walking, or as complex as planning special getaways to surprise each other with. One couple told us that they made sure that whenever one of them came home from work or a trip out of the house the spouse that was at home would immediately stop what they were doing and go greet the other at the door. They insisted that they would be the first to greet their spouse, not the children, and certainly not the dog (as hard as that is many times). In this way they were telling their spouse that they were the most important person in their life.


My wife, Jan, and I learned to do this many years ago and though we no longer have a dog or kids at home, we still try to greet each other at the door with a hug and a kiss. We also enjoy holding hands whenever we walk and while sitting together or at the table during dinner. We find this connection says “I Love You and want to be near you as much as possible”.


Jan’s parents never left their home without seeking the other out and kissing them goodbye. We try to do this but don’t do it as consistently as her parents did. However, we have found that you can never say “I love you” too much. This is not only a statement of fact, but it is a promise of continued belief in what God has given us and asked us to do.


We also pray together and make sure that at the end of our prayer we thank God for molding and shaping us to be the best partner we can be for each other. Now, sometimes that process of molding and shaping has been rough, but we definitely see and are delighted in the results we now have in our marriage.


So, what little (or big) things do you do for and to each other to keep your love growing and staying fresh and active?

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